Monday, June 13, 2011

of instincts..


As I was walking to the bus stop, I heard my phone vibrate. At first, I thought it was Fred calling but later found out it was my mum on the other end. After the usual greetings, I got the feeling that she knew something was up.

“Katey, are you sure you are okay?”

“Yes mum. I’m doing fine.”

“Don’t try to lie to me dear. What is happening with you? Are you and Fred okay?”

“Mum, everything is fine. Why do you think that something is wrong?”

“I’m sorry dear. When you will become a mother, you will get to understand why am asking all this. You will know when your child is not doing alright. I’m pretty sure at the moment I’m right.”

“Well, maybe it’s because I’m just from a job interview.”

“How was it?”

“It was tough mum but I’m sure ill get it.”

“That’s the spirit dear.”

“Thank you. How is dad doing?”

“He is okay. His business is not doing very well but he will manage.”

“I know. He has such a strong spirit.”

“And you took after him. Kate, I have to go. I can smell the food burning.”

“What?”

“I had food in the oven and forgot all about it. Talk to you tomorrow and fill me in on the work situation.”

“Okay mum, bye.”

“Bye.”

Even though it was nice hearing from her, she spooked me a little bit. Her questions regarding how I was doing were so damn right on point. I couldn’t tell her of what I did or maybe she knows I had an abortion? I haven’t been feeling okay since the abortion and guess it all comes to the guilt conscience that I have been having. She is freaking me out!

As the bus came into the final stop near the bus stop, I wished I could had opened up to her. She wouldn’t have liked the decision but could have supported me no matter what. Maybe just a little.

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