Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Healing



The next three days were really long and uncomfortable for me. Lying all day looking up the white ceiling and the silence of the hospital made me feel more sick. The nurses did their rounds as if it was clockwork. They came at six in the morning, at ten, during lunch hour and in the evening.  Some of the people in the ward that I was in left and we remained only two of us alongside another elderly woman. Luckily for me, Fred and mum never left my bedside. I also received other visitors like my brother and his family who brought me beautiful flowers each time they came. Fred had also informed Ann and Mike. Although Ann wouldn’t make it, Mike came to see me the day I was being discharged. It’s good to have people around you that you can count on when in need.

Fred took me home and cared for me like a baby. The helped me bath which was a task since my lower tummy ached. He also helped feed me by preparing fruits and blending them. He also ensured that the bed was always made, the house clean and had a constant supply of movies to watch so that i couldnt get bored.

Without his help, I am not sure how I would have done it. The emotional support was the real deal for me. I cried a lot. The pain of losing the baby was too much but I also thanked God for giving me another chance to live. Deep in my heart, I thought maybe it a punishment for the abortion that I did over a year ago. Was I experiencing karma? I had gotten rid of a baby but when I really needed one, I lost it.  I wasn’t ready for it then so I decided on the easier way. Fred also spoke about it with so much difficulty and expressed how he truly felt. He actually shed a tear! He was sorry that it had happened the way it did. He also added that we give ourselves time to heal before we decide to try again.

I spent a total of two weeks at home before returning back to work. I didn’t do much work as my colleagues tried all their best to help me around. Some of them had visited my house to see me and they brought along flowers, card and a letter from my boss who passed her message to me. Everyone was really helpful.

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